What Do I Do Next?

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Sometimes I don’t know what to write in my blog.

Ideas pass through my mind but they feel empty. This one takes too long. That one doesn’t have enough energy. The one I thought of last week doesn’t seem so interesting anymore. And so my mind chatters on, trying to make sense of what to do next.

All I can do is open and wait. Let something come through.

This is the space on the edge of the unknown. Where everything is alive, dynamic, fresh.

This is the place where life isn’t planned. I have no control, but I must stay on point.

I don’t know anymore whether I’m writing something useful or not. I can’t judge the quality in the moment. I can only be present and see what emerges.

There’s a creative tension on this edge. I can easily give up and say I’ll do it later. I can also write anything that comes in a free flow of words.

But something different happens if I stay with the tension instead of finding a way to get rid of it. There’s a space in between, on the edge of life.

This is the space where beauty forms and joy expresses. There’s a power inside this space that I can be afraid of or I can embrace.

When I step forward into that unknown, I’m ready for something new, something I’ve never shared before.

It feels vulnerable, not because I’m baring my soul or exposing my emotions, but because I don’t know.

I’m not resting on a mountain of formed experience. I’m not streaming an extra-dimensional being of deep wisdom.

I stand revealed.

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