What is the simplest, most powerful way to change your life? Ask for help. That’s pretty much all it takes. It’s all too easy, when you are struggling with anything, to think you need to solve it on your own. We learned in school not to look at what other people were doing and not to get help from our friends because it was cheating. We were largely educated for independence, personal achievement and aiming to be the best. Asking for help was what you had to do when you didn’t understand – not a comfortable place to be.
I have noticed that a lot of people find it extremely difficult, if not completely alien, to ask for help with their life, especially in front of other people. It often takes an incurable illness, debilitating divorce or complete business failure before they are really willing to open up, say what’s going on and ask for help. This is such a pity. It causes years and years of suffering, pain and misery that could be avoided – and I am not exaggerating. Something happens when we ask for help, even if we do not know who to ask or what help we need. Whether you ask a friend, an expert or the universe, these requests are always heard and responded to in ways that are surprising and often touching. The response may not come directly from the person you ask and it may come from a completely different direction than anything you imagined.
In my experience, a sincere request for help is the most powerful trigger for healing. Asking in front of a group of people magnifies the power of the request hugely – this is the reason why I prefer to run group sessions rather than one-on-ones for people who want to solve serious problems. Asking when you feel really ashamed or embarrassed can be even more powerful – the simple fact that you are willing to overcome the shame seems to give you extra credit. If you’re not sure who to ask, here are some simple guidelines:
- Ask an expert If you know someone who can solve the problem directly this is simple. If not, ask around to find someone.
- Ask a friend It’s not always wise to listen to a friend’s advice, unless they are also an expert, because they rarely know how to solve the problem, but the simple act of asking will bring you really effective help from other sources.
- Ask absolutely anyone It is the asking itself that is most powerful, not the conversation that follows. When you ask you open yourself to receiving a solution. It may arrive almost by magic.
- Ask God, Source, the universe or your version of a supreme power or being. Angels, archangels, guides, your Higher Self and other similar beings are also always good. It just works. Don’t ask why or how. Appreciate and ask for more.